I know because 1) I'm pregnant and I've been getting comments like this for over a month, all from men. And 2) I know other pregnant ladies, and they hate it, too...more than I do, actually. They are ready to inflict pain upon the next person who says a word about their size.
And it doesn't just mean the woman feels fat. Not at all. In fact, according to some skinny women I've talked to, it's just as bothersome to be called "small" or "tiny." It's all about the fact that every pregnant woman is different, and every pregnancy is different. You simply can't compare one woman with the next. We all have our sizes and shapes, and we all carry it differently.
For me, it's more about the fact that I've had two miscarriages and am completely freaked out about anything that may be out of the norm for this third pregnancy. Everything makes me nervous, including stupid sonograms that tell me I'm measuring too far ahead, or that my due date is inaccurate, or that there's excess skin at the back of the baby's neck that could be a problem.
I have dreams about the baby dying in utero, or having Down Syndrome. I have nightmares about something happening before the birth that will hurt the baby, or make the baby unhealthy. Or I think, "Maybe it's too late? I already f#%ed everything up."
I've been to therapy about it, talked to counselors about it, and my OBGYN is concerned about it. It's just the thing that I'm dealing with and trying to control with every ounce of my being. I swallow my fear on a daily basis and try to remain positive and calm for the sake of the pregnancy. It doesn't always work, however.
So telling me I'm "huge for my month" is not the best thing to say, as you can probably guess.
I know intentions are always good. I know that people are trying to be "supportive." I'm just letting you-who-like-to-comment-about-bellies know that it does not come off that way. No one likes to be compared to the size of a whale.
To recap: Whales are humongous. Pregnant women glow.
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