Mastitis...

AGAIN.  This is my third round with mastitis, and I can safely say that I am an expert in all things breast infected.  Not exactly the silver lining I was looking for during my stint with breast feeding.

This time it was a little different, however.  I felt the pain and knew right away...mastitis.  It had to be.  There was no mistaking it.  It was an aching hot throb that made one side of my breast hurt so badly I winced when I fed the baby.  Then, the pain got worse, but very quickly.  Before the fever hit, I had already told my husband to call the advice nurse to get a prescription for antibiotics straight away.  By the next hour I had a fever steadily rising.  See?  Expert.

As soon as I started feeling the pains and the lumps of clogged milk in my breast, I started hand expressing and warm compresses to get the infection out.  I knew it was important to get all the milk out of the breast, so the infection wouldn't linger.  For over an hour I groped myself.  It was pretty (not) awesome reaching second base with myself.

The next day was my older son's birthday party, which I attended, feeling a little deathly.  Two Tylenol and a playground full of kids pumped me up for the next three hours, which seemed ok compared to the hideous time I had with this beastly ailment before.  But that night I collapsed in a heap with a 102 fever.  It had come back with a vengeance and I was sick as a dog.

The antibiotics finally kicked in, everything stopped looking like a big disgusting purple bruise, and I felt much better the next day.  I kicked mastitis' ass and lived to talk about it...again.

The next day I had shooting pains so powerfully painful I thought to myself, "Holy God, I'd rather go through LABOR again than feel this."  When I looked it up on the internet, the only thing that kept popping up repeatedly?  THRUSH.  Not possible.  NOT OK.

After calling the advice nurse, she confirmed it was thrush.  "Thrush happens when you take antibiotics for mastitis.  Antibiotics kill the good bacteria that keeps your yeast in check.  Now, there's an overgrowth of yeast."  Ok, now what?  "Apply Vagasil to your nipples."  What?  Gross.  I'll do it, but gross.

Somehow, applying a vaginal yeast infection cream to my nipples didn't seem right, so I called the lovely ladies at the lactation center who promptly said, "Thrush?  No.  Damaged nerve ending?  Yup!"  They suggested a cocktail of B-6 (for the damaged nerve) and probiotics (to take while taking antibiotics.)

To triple check the possibility I had thrush and had given it to the baby, we also saw the pediatrician, who checked the baby's mouth for the tell-tale white spots, looked at me like I was a loon, and said in his thick accent, "No thrush.  Usually, baby gives thrush to mama.  Not mama give thrush to baby.  No thrush." And then I was sent on my way with a prescription for Nystatin (just in case thrush popped up in the next day or two) and a pat on the head.

So what have we learned?  Don't look on the internet.  The internet is not a doctor.  The internet will drive you mad with unnecessary worry.  Also, NO GOOGLE IMAGE SEARCHING.  It's for your own good.

Also, when websites tell you that thrush can be stealthy and that the symptoms can be hidden?  Not true, sayeth the wise and sage lactation specialists I talked to.  And the pediatrician confirmed it.  There are always white spots in the baby's mouth, and always raw hamburger-looking nipples. Not comforting, but there it is.

Mastitis Hell

At 5:15 in the morning, I sit on the couch watching Tivo'd shows feeling not unlike a naughty kid trying to get away with something she shouldn't be doing. That's what motherhood feels like to me when I get a moment to myself...I'm getting away with something.

But the reason I'm up at 5:15 in the morning instead of sleeping while the baby slumbers is something far more sobering than daydreaming about being a naughty kid. I have mastitis.

For those who have never had mastitis, here's a medical description from Dr. Sears:

Mastitis means that the breast is inflamed, and there is swelling, redness, tenderness and pain. There may be an infection, so it is wise to consult your health-care provider to determine whether or not an antibiotic is necessary. A breast infection can become a breast abscess that requires surgical draining, but this can almost always be prevented by treating mastitis promptly.

Signs of mastitis include:

• Part or all of the breast is intensely painful, hot, tender, red, and swollen. Some mothers can pinpoint a definite area of inflammation, while at other times the entire breast is tender.

• You feel tired, run down, achy, have chills or think you have the flu. A breastfeeding mother who thinks she has the flu probably has mastitis. Mothers with mastitis will sometimes experience these flu-like symptoms, even before they get a fever or notice breast tenderness.

• You have chills or feel feverish, or your temperature is 101F or higher.These symptoms suggest that you have an infection.

• You are feeling progressively worse, your breasts are growing more tender, and your fever is becoming more pronounced. With simple engorgement, a plugged duct, or mastitis without infection, you gradually feel better instead of worse.

• Recent events have set you up for mastitis: cracked or bleeding nipples, stress or getting run down, missed feedings or longer intervals between feedings.

Now here's my personal description of mastitis:

First, you feel like you may shiver to death. It comes out of nowhere and hits you like a sledgehammer. Then, the fever comes on even faster. Mine rose from 101 to 103 in less than a few hours.

So you think, "Hm, I have the flu. This too shall pass." But NO. It shall NOT pass. It shall continue to get worse until you are praying for death. In fact, you FEEL like death. One of your breasts suddenly starts getting pink in a spot, then it gets warm. Perhaps it starts to itch. One way or another, your breast is in pain. You notice it most when you try to breast feeding and your baby's tongue feels like it has spikes on it. It literally brought tears to my eyes.

Then you call the advice nurse or the lactation specialist. She gets you connected with your doctor who prescribes you some antibiotics that will supposedly kill whatever has obviously created evil in your milk ducts. While you are waiting for your medication to work you pump 10-12 times a day or your breastfeed constantly to drain your breast of the infection. Sounds gross to be feeding your baby infected boob milk? The baby is the one who probably gave you the infection, so he/she won't mind.

Now the antibiotics have been in your system for a little while and suddenly you start to feel queasy. You pick up the instructions for the meds and see the first symptoms on the sheet...nausea and vomiting. Then, you vomit.

You can't eat because you feel sick to your stomach 24/7. Then, you can eat, but you throw it up. Meanwhile, you're still trying to get rid of the fever and pain you've had for two days with prescription Motrin, which you can't take on an empty stomach. But wait, you can't take antibiotics unless you're on an empty stomach. You're screwed.

So here I sit at 5:15 in the morning, starving, but on antibiotics. I pray the meds will get rid of this crap because I can't seem to get over the feeling that I may actually be dying of mastitis. I may be the first person ever on the planet to die from this stupid infection. I'll be in all the medical journals for sure.

It's all in the name of breast feeding my baby. Am I being punished for having inverted nipples? Or maybe it's because I've been sneaking a supplement of formula in at night when I'm too tired to nurse...either way, someone up there hates my guts...and my boob.